Belichick Enters NFL Hall Of Shame

In the finest tradition of the craft, even the best magicians sometimes either deliberately or inadvertently reveal their secrets.

Such was the case this week when New England Patriots coach Bill "ooh! Matt, put the camera down QUICK!" Belichick revealed how he ended up winning three Super Bowls... he cheated. And in getting caught, demonstrated to the world what lengths a well-paid, highly-successful coach will go to to keep up his paycheck.

Yes, erstwhile nemesis of fair-playing football teams everywhere, the New England Patriots were slapped Thursday night with a $250,000 fine and the loss of a draft pick, and Belichick hammered with a $500,000 fine ("sorry, my 'other woman', the world cruise is out this year, Roger wants that new motor home") all for spying video-camera style, on their opponents' signals during the Patriots' game against the New York Jets.

Apparently it all started going south when video assistant Matt Estrella's camera was confiscated while he was on the Jets' sideline. In actuality, Estrella's actions just pushed Belichick a few more miles down the I-95 highway (500,000 miles to be exact) in a landmark year for an extremely public-eye coach who's shown little boys how to aspire to football greatness, and little girls how to slap their future husbands with successful divorce suits.

Belichick's troubles range from being named the "other man" in a New Jersey divorce suit which resuted in the breakup of his marriage, to having former linebacker Ted Johnson accuse Belichick of overruling doctors and sending Johnson back onto the field too soon after his concussion. And let's not forget about the hilariously humiliating defeat to the Indianapolis Colts in last year's AFC championship, a game in which the Patriots had a 15-point halftime lead. The Colts went on to beat the Chicago Bears in last year's Super Bowl. Had Belichick actually spied on the Colts, perhaps he could have gotten his fourth NFL title in six years. But perhaps Matt was sick that day.

In a letter to the Patriots organization, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell branded the Patriots as cheaters. "This episode represents a calculated and deliberate attempt to avoid longstanding rules designed to encourage fair play and promote honest competition on the playing field," the commissioner wrote. His ruling will, besides TKO'ing Belichick with the maximim fine, would, should the Patriots make the playoffs (how hard can YOU pray?) make it the first time ever in NFL history that a first-round draft pick has been taken away as a punishment for infraction of NFL rules.

And speaking of NFL rules, I think the sweetest irony for a coach who's (somehow) won 3 NFL titles, is the content of his initial statement, in which he said he 'misinterpreted' league rules. OK... "misinterpreting" league rules to help your team win three Super Bowls... sorry, but is anyone else buying that? I didn't think so.

You can't be a major player in NFL coaching history, lead your team to three titles, be the holy terror of the AFC, and NOT know how the league wants its rules interpreted!

It seems to me that people, including Belichick himself, are trying rapidly to distance themselves from the severity of this infraction, and are trying to "dumb down" the potential implications for investigations of the franchise reaching years back. Belichick, in a press conference Friday, when pummelled with questions about the scandal, said, "It doesn't matter... It already happened. So right now, we're focusing in on what's in front of us, and that's the Chargers."

Fullback Heath Evans joked about taking up a collection to pay Belichick's part of the fines, but said of Belichick, "I view Bill in my own way..."

Even Patriots Chairman & CEO Robert Kraft said in a written statement on the Patriots official website:

"After reviewing the facts of the past weekend, the commissioner has made a
determination that our franchise engaged in activities that violate the league’s
rules. He has determined the punishment and I accept it.

"I believe that Coach Belichick always tries to do what is best for the team
and he is always accountable for his decisions. He has been a very important
part of what our organization has accomplished over the last seven years. In
this case, one of his decisions has resulted in a severe penalty for our
franchise. He has paid a heavy price and so has our organization. He has
apologized for his actions. I accept his apology and look forward to working
with him as we move forward."

Notice that Kraft didn't come out and laud praises over Belichick and say how he stands behind him 100% and that they're going to see him through this... no, he left it more open-ended. Perhaps Bob will be in the mall later this season shopping for a new coach...?

It seems that Belichick's troubles just won't leave him alone. The publicity of this cheating scandal, and the potential that will doubtless be discussed for months to come that this isn't the first time Belichick and the Patriots have resorted to such dirty-low tactics, is just another layer in a life full of sinful distractions for a coach who preaches to his team about avoiding them.

So, whether or not the Patriots make it to the Super Bowl this year, one thing is pretty certain: many eyes will be scanning opponents' sidelines for the remainder of this season, looking for the next Handycam. Or maybe Bill will change tactics and hire the new GoogleEarth satellite to read signals from space.

Asterisk

I was at work whenever the news came over the wires that Barry Bonds hit number 756 at San Francisco's AT&T Park last night (August 7, 2007) to beat Hank Aaron's storied record.

What struck me about this record is how long it took someone else to beat it; what struck me more is the person who did.

Go figure that he'd have effectively stopped the game for the home-plate crossing with son and godfather Willie Mays at his side, the thank-you's, the video from the legendary Aaron himself, the cheering from the hypnotized Giants fans (even Barry was quoted as saying he was hoping to have broken the record in a home game where he was assured of a friendly reception).

Conspiciously absent were Aaron himself, and baseball commissioner Bud Selig, though the latter did talk with Bonds via telephone and issued a statement afterwards.

OK... so Barry smacked number 756 and no doubt for the remainder of the regular season, will only add to that number, making it all the more interesting for someone else to break in future seasons. What's all the fuss?

The fuss is that the record is suspect; that the achievement may be drug-induced, and that baseball may never be the same.

OK, so maybe the last statement is extreme, but I do have reservations about this so-called historic milestone. My personal concern, and I believe the concern that is at the heart of this controversy, stems from recalling his days as a wiry leadoff batter with the Pittsburgh Pirates in 1986. In a matter of a very short few seasons, he went from a run-of-the-mill batter with Pittsburgh, to being a bulked-up slugger once signed free-agent with the Giants in 1993. This seemingly all-too-quick transformation in batting and running (base-stealing) power seemed almost unheard of in major league sport, unless (as has already been demonstrated in other situations) the athletes were using some sort of steroid. That Bonds improved his game at an age when virtually every other player of such age declines, is even more suspect for the use of anabolic steroids.

Barry Bonds has consistently denied "knowingly using performance-enhancing drugs".

Never mind that Bonds has been implicated in the infamous BALCO scandal, and that his own testimony to the grand jury included comments that he "may have unknowingly been given 'the clear' and 'the cream'", claiming he was told the substances were flaxseed oil.

What I think most people just don't believe is that how all-stars like Yankees slugger Jason Giambi (and presumably his brother Jeremy, who also admitted to using steroids during his career) can get THG ("the cream" and "the clear") from BALCO with the full knowledge of what these products were, yet Barry could have supposedly missed the point altogether, and BALCO told him it was all just "flaxseed oil". Duh.

What I presume will happen, beyond the generic, limp-wristed comments of congrats from Bud Selig, Hank Aaron, and others in the sport, will be the absolute silence from Barry's colleagues elsewhere outside of San Francisco. I suspect that rather than place themselve on the potential wrong side of public opinion, baseball's other greats and near-greats will rather call Barry and say "congratulations" and leave those well-wishes off-camera and off-microphone.

I maintained to my friends and work associates interested in baseball, that what major league pitchers SHOULD have done is intentionally walk Bonds on every at-bat, so he could never reach this point. Sure this probably would have drawn the ire of MLB administration, but the pitchers could have passed it off as simply not wanting to risk additional HR's or RBI's in their games (heck, Barry's also a notable walk-at-bat king in his career, so what would have been a few more?). And sure it would have drawn the ire of Giants fans, but... what was the point there about caring what Giants fans feel?

Now that the dirty deed has been done, what Major League Baseball SHOULD do, is what San Diego fans did a little while back, mirroring what no doubt a majority of baseball fans around the world feel: use the asterisk. This number should be noted on the record books with an asterisk and an explanation about how this record is "in dispute due to ongoing debate regarding Mr. Bonds' alleged use of performance-enhancing agents."

In the meantime, all we can hope for is that this so-called "record" won't hold for another 33 years. Perhaps, in the interest of preserving baseball's image as untarnished as possible, all the pitchers in the next season or two who face Alex Rodriguez should intentionally throw home run-capable balls to him, so he can hit a single-run homer at every such at-bat, and he can shatter Bonds' so-called "achievement" soon. Go A-Rod, at least you're not rubbing "flaxseed oil" all over ya.

Upping The Columbine Ante

Upping The Columbine Ante

On Monday (April 16th), my wife and I were in a local coffee shop when, shortly before, all hell broke loose at Virginia Tech. What was to be a relaxing morning of sipping coffee and engaging in quiet conversation with each other (a prized commodity these days for us), turned into a mouth-gaping quiet horror as we watched the drama unfold live on one of the major news channels that the coffee shop big-screen had running. People came and went in the shop (which its owner-roasted coffees top the nationals -- eat your heart out, Starbucks!), and no matter if they were there to sit with free Wi-Fi and work, or whether they were just stopping in for a quick cup of java-to-go, it seemed everyone had his or her eyes glued to the screens. Even one of the employees was overheard to be upset over the fact that one of her friends attends Virginia Tech and she was worried if her friend was among the living or one of the then rapidly-changing numbers of dead.

It seemed as if the whole world stopped for that Monday morning, transfixed on the actions of at least one "postal"-minded shooter taking out scores of kids for even now unknown reasons. Did we just give this bozo what he wanted, in international media spotlight and worldwide audience attention? Or was he even thinking that millions upon millions of civilized people around the world would be mesmerized by his actions when he picked up his subtly-gotten weapons and had at it?

My wife and I sat there, and I couldn't help thinking that this guy was just upping the Columbine ante... for years, we've been consumed by greater protection in our high schools, especially after horrible incidents that are burned with instantly-recognizable names in the collective consciousness of the nation: Columbine, Red Lake, Jonesboro... But these were high school kids, they shouldn't be handling weapons anyway. This wasn't a college shooting.

That happened later. With the Dawson College (Canada) shooting last year, we seemed to graduate young Mr. Shootist from high school and place him firmly into college. The shooting at Virginia Tech, among other things, seemed to recall the 1966 University of Texas-Austin shooting, just at a time when we perhaps looked back and said "it can't happen here" and went on our merry ways.

Go figure that the media would blow out of proportion Internet rumours about the pro-gun NRA lobby's position on the shooting, just at the time when it should have been time to pause the debate and grieve for those lost. Even Mr Murdoch's own News Corp. holdings had jumped into that raucous discussion, and later with collective red-face backed off the story when they found out it was as much of an Internet snope-hunt as the one about Starbucks defiantly refusing to send coffee to our troops in Iraq (if you still believe that one, there's some property in Florida I'd LOVE to sell ya).

Now don't get me wrong… I am very much a proponent of the Second Amendment, and the right of the people to keep and bear arms - with my personal caveat of those arms being kept for self-defence and for pure "sport", such as animal/game hunting. But in light of the Seung-hui Cho's apparent ease of obtaining weapons with which he ultimately did the OTHER "dirty deed", and let's not forget the local Pittsburgh, PA, area problem of state representative Bob Regola and his son being firmly in the middle of a teen suicide in which Regola's gun was the deadly weapon, there needs to be in this country much LESS political side-stepping over the issue, and much MORE honest, fruitful discussion about how guns can be kept at a minimum in the hands of the criminal and the mentally disturbed.

I recalled in the past several days through the mountains of audio and print media discussion over Virginia Tech, that it was said one of Cho's teachers had recognised a disturbing trend in Cho's class writings, and when she reported this to school officials, it was basically fluffed off as irrelevant, in the light of the fact that Cho as of yet hadn't "done anything". Brilliant. Just allow nut-jobs to obtains deadly weapons, then wait for them to do something before we slap their hands saying "no-no" or allowing some SWAT junkie to whack them down.

No, what needed to happen there, was for this young man to have been "told on" to the Virginia State Police, who then should have monitored this kid just like the Feds monitor suspected terrorists without our knowledge or consent. C'mon, if it's good enough for the FBI to be listening into peoples' phone conversations because they suspect they're going to hijack the next plane-bomb, why can't they do the same with students suspected by their teachers of harbouring some killing-spree rage inside them? And if after some type of evaluation, psychological or otherwise, they're shown to be wrong, we give them an apology and a hefty credit for their next year's tax return.

But to sit idly by, saying "sorry he didn't do anything yet" is the same as some standing below Two World Trade Center, watching the plane hitting the building, and saying, "gee, maybe we should call the fire department or something."

Well, DUH.

Man Against The World

It seems like just when you've mastered (or think you've mastered) one concept in life or piece of technology, someone else ups the ante and comes up with something else for you to worry about.

Take for instance, blogging. OK, so I've had a blog elsewhere for a couple of years; not like I ever wrote much to it, but it was there... waiting for me... to get finished with nursing school, I suppose.

Now comes Myspace.com. OK, so it's owned by a big corporate mogul... why should that bother me? I'm supposedly a conservative Republican, and big corporations should be right up my alley, right? For a Philly-minded conservative Republican, I hope my fellow Republicans (all except for Arlen Specter, of course) would forgive me for being a bit "California liberal" on this big corporate culture point... even though it was the California liberal "dot-com" culture that ultimately caused the demise of my really excellent job in IT, which caused me to fall back on what I wanted to do over 20 years ago -- RN nursing... but I digress.

The "Myspace.com" culture is so pervasive at my school right now, I hear kids through the hall talking about their Myspace pages this and their Myspace pages that. All this culmiated one day a week ago when someone asked me for my "Myspace" address... and when I balked, this person was all like, "Oh my GAWD... why don't you have a Myspace page?"

To which I replied, in typical not-thinking-before-speaking Dilbert's New Ruling Class definition of "inDUHvidual" style, "Oh, well I just never got into all that Facebook thing much."

To which this person whacked back, "But it's not 'FaceBook', it's Myspace."

Now you have to realise one thing... I am a 40-something, going BACK to school to earn a degree BELOW one I already hold, amongst an overwhelming crowd of people who most likely just graduated from high school, still live with Mommy & Daddy (or some modern adaptation of that), probably having Mom/Dad/Grams/Etc. paying their way through college, and don't have to work unless they want to have some hand money for, say, unlimited text messaging on their Razr phone... or the latest Kanye West download for their 920 GB iPod... or more drugs to help them through school.

So, when these "kids" (that's the only way I can describe some of them) tell me about why don't I have a "Myspace" page, what do I do? Get online and sign up for one, that's what I do... not to be outdone by my juniors who no doubt will end up making more money in nursing then I ever will by virtue of the fact that they'll probably be still working when I'm dead (unless they die first of say, smoking... or drugs... or listening to Kanye West downloads).

So, putting this thing together with all the other stuff I have to do, like going to school and WORKING to provide for an actual family, I am finding just enough time to breathe, let alone to pimp out my new-found "Myspace" page, sold-out as the whole thing already is to the big-NewsCorp culture. If I had decided to take my Bachelor's degree literally, I'd probably be solidly in the Murdoch camp, probably running around embedded in some US or British platoon in the middle of Iraq if I wasn't already a weekend anchor for some TV news outlet.

It all feels like a "man against the world" type of thing... those of you old enough to remember, will recall the song from the band Survivor (which incidentally, I was listening to before 'Til Tuesday). Just when you've one thing down, something else rears its head. I just recently mastered the art of logging online to my nursing school textbook's website to download chapter content so I don't have to lug the GD 812-pound tome around school, and here comes this kid wondering why I don't have a MYSPACE PAGE!?

OK, so here I am... and hopefully between the gasping breaths I take between lecture, lab, clinical, work, work, work, soccer practice, work, soccer game, work, synagogue, church, work... I'll have time to keep things like this up... because I surely don't want to upset the 19-year-old who is no doubt scouring Myspace for my page.

- NursingGuy